Dharma Library

A large collection of articles, from past issues of New Chan Forum and more besides.

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Retreat Report – Silent Illumination July 2022

A cup of tea

heatwave
only the butterflies
still busy

I am a chatterer, verbalising everything in my head all the time, keeping a running commentary going and explaining events to some imaginary listener. It took me a while to realise on retreat that the ‘Silent’ in ‘Silent Illumination’ was not the silence of nature but had to be the silence of me.

I was strict with myself and cut down the flow of the wordy…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2022 , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports , Anon

Retreat Report, Koan Retreat September 2022, a poem

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Planting a great oak at Shawbottom
and returning each year to say, “I did that”,
that would be something.
The sapling trees were ready in pots,
the spade resting against the shed.

I could only claim a short-lived success
weeding between the paving slabs.
About his many enlightenment experiences
Sawaki Roshi once said,
“they didn’t amount to a whole hill of beans”.

In my secret koan, ‘Tokusan’s Bowls’,
eg…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2022 , Poetry , Koan Retreat Reports , Anon

Chan Brushwork Retreat 2019

Calligraphy for the character Chan

The image that comes to mind when I try to sum up the retreat is of a triple: a three-legged stool, a tripod, a triptych. This represents what were for me the three components of the retreat: the huatou, the brushwork, and the sitting. Each locked into the other.

I can’t remember the exact words of the huatou but in essence Joshu asks Nansen how to pursue The Way. Nansen tells him that making…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2019 , Chan Retreat Reports , Anon

Western Zen Retreat April 2019, a participant reports

Calligraphy for the character Chan

I arrived not knowing what the retreat was going to be like. I knew we would investigate the question “who am I?” but preferred to find out how once I got there to avoid expectations or anxiety. I was very much looking forward to the luxury of having everything organised for me. I would not have to make any decisions, just follow instructions and bells. This time, I didn't even wear a watch and it…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2019 , Western Zen Retreat Reports , Anon

Shattering the Great Doubt, Crosby Hall, August 2017

Calligraphy for the character Chan

…Day two. Koan day. I eventually plumped for one that, rather arrogantly, I believed I could answer. Hah! Silliness. We sat, the Koan playing in my mind as I searched for an answer. After a few sessions, Simon brought in a communication exercise whereby each retreatant sits with another and takes it in turns to answer a question on their Koan. I was coupled with the most open and honest individual…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2017 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Reflections on Chan Taster Week, Derbyshire, February 2017

Calligraphy for the character Chan

The first day was just awful really. Sitting there, facing myself. It was like torture. No distraction, no ‘phone a friend’, no reading, no internet, no work, no walking the dog, no watching tv. Just sitting there, having to face what emerges in my mind. I found it unbearable. I really did think I could not bear to stay and started thinking about how I could just leave. I was cold; it didn’t…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2017 , Anon , Chan Retreat Reports

Silent Illumination February 2015

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Extracts from a report on the Silent Illumination retreat of February 2015.

Thursday

Simon gives another amazing, and uncannily accurate, Dharma talk. It is a huge relief to hear about compassion in Chan. Simon says, “In case you haven’t noticed, you’re all on a solitary retreat” – that would explain it! If this is a solitary retreat, albeit with supportive conditions, no wonder I’ve been…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2015 , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports , Anon

Western Zen Retreat with Hilary and Rebecca, February 2015

Calligraphy for the character Chan

I was amazed to see how much came up during the communication exercises.

It went on till the last exercise unhindered by my attempt to tie things up and put a nice bit of wrapping paper around them.

It can be summarized in 'Who am I when nothing is happening?' because I really do not know who I am when I am not continually adding to my sense of self by putting a few more compliments in my nice…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2015 , Western Zen Retreat Reports , Anon

Great Doubt

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Koan retreats with the Western Chan Fellowship have become a staple part of my dharma practice over the past few years since I have found a connection with this specific method. Coming to Wales for such retreats has become routine for me, and I had no expectations on booking it or on arrival.

One day into the retreat it became clear that my practice was very different to previous retreats. On…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2013 , Koan Retreat Reports , Anon

Rephrasing and Asking

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Silent Illumination retreat report

I arrived to the retreat ill. Nothing really serious, just a sore throat and runny nose, but still I was a bit worried about waking up my room-mates with a cough at night. Moreover before the retreat I had neglected my practice, and now expected the first days to be rather difficult. But surprisingly everything went fine: beautiful sunny weather cured me within…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2013 , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports , Anon

Experience

Calligraphy for the character Chan

A Silent Illumination retreat report

Similar to my last retreats I shifted pretty fast into the retreat modus, where thoughts are kept in the background and the focus stays for the most part in the present moment. Generally a very pleasant state.

During the interview Simon said that there is something I keep inside myself – something I do not really look at. We were then discussing that I have…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2013 , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports , Anon

Finely Tuned

Calligraphy for the character Chan

As I write this, two days after my return, I am fine tuned. My heart is brilliant, clear and unobstructed. Someone throws a ball for a dog, which charges across the park, a furry blur of mad energy with scampering legs, and I laugh out loud. The sky has a glow which takes your breath away. I respond to these things with delight and amusement. I hear about the school massacre and weep without…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2012 , Anon , Koan Retreat Reports

Seeing the Mountain

Calligraphy for the character Chan

The following is a practitioner's report of a silent illumination retreat led by Simon Child from November 20-27, 2010. As is the custom, the retreatant's name is not being published. The report was edited for the Chan Magazine by Simon Child.

The first day and a half of the retreat was strangely tumultuous. I have been to retreat many times but this was only the second time this decade that I…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2010 , Anon , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports

Daily Menu - A Cook's Retreat

Calligraphy for the character Chan

Sunday

Courgette, coconut and Lemon soup.
Bread rolls
Citrus and poppy seed cake.
Mushroom and Lovage stew
Creamy polenta
Green allotment salad.

The beginning of a Hua-Tou retreat, my first retreat of the year and I feel I really need it. Somehow, I’ve lost focus and cannot see beyond grey clouds. There is a nice group of people, balanced; John and Jake as teachers, which is quite a treat.

I came a…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2011 , Other Retreat Reports , Anon

Clarity and Confusion

Calligraphy for the character Chan

I’m not quite sure why it has taken me until now to write this report, nor why I have decided this moment to do it. Maybe it will become clear as I write it.

The retreat was a Silent Illumination retreat at Maenllwyd with John Crook and Fiona Nuttall in July 2010. Today is 5th November 2010. Maybe the lapse of time is portentous? I can see this as I write it.

The weather was totally beautiful…

Western Chan Fellowship CIO

Categories: 2011 , Anon , Silent Illumination Retreat Reports

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